The Conflict Resolution Toolbox

"I wish I had your toolbox"

I hear that all the time.

Hi there, I'm Tammy Lenski. Maybe you know me from one of my conflict resolution books, my podcast, or my long-running conflict resolution blog.

I started developing my conflict resolution toolbox 20 years ago when I first started out as a professional mediator, coach, and consultant. I wanted more techniques for helping people stay calm under pressure, creative ways to solve problems and overcome deadlock, tools to improve communication and collaboration, and techniques to confront without damaging the relationship.

Since then I've field-tested countless methods and techniques, made complicated ideas understandable as a conflict resolution prof, and translated scientific research into practical strategies and techniques.

Now I want to share my toolbox with you.

Introducing the Conflict Resolution Toolbox

The Conflict Resolution Toolbox is organized into five "compartments":

Toolbox foundations: How to use the tools effectively

Tools are only useful when we choose the right tool for the task, learn how to use it well, and use it at the right time. The foundations section of Toolbox will help you learn how to do just that.

Communication tools: How we express ourselves and exchange information

There's a lot of background noise in conflict, negotiations, and other difficult conversations. What we say, how we say it, how well we listen, and how well we bring our curiosity to the table can make the situation better -- or worse. The communication tools I've selected help quiet the background noise and enable us to detect the core signals needing attention.

Self-mastery tools: How we stay centered under pressure

The best conflict resolution and communication skills in the world are little use if we can't access them when we need them most. Self-mastery is about being able to think clearly, respond nimbly, and maintain our equilibrium in the face of difficult and stressful interactions.

Mental model tools: How we make sense of things

We use mental models to make sense of our world and experiences. Mental models are the beliefs, frameworks, mental images, and generalizations we use to understand and explain what’s happening. Specific mental models aren’t “wrong” or “right.” A mental model that’s helpful in one circumstance can be ineffective in another..

Process tools: How we orchestrate the conversation

We can improve the quality of decisions and increase the likelihood that agreements will stand the test of time by the way we structure the conversation, frame the problem to be solved, and generate solutions. The process tools I've selected help you be more strategic during problem solving.

How it works

You'll get full lifetime access to all of the available tools:

• 100+ of the best tools and articles from 20 years of writing about and doing conflict resolution professionally, organized by tool type to make them easily accessible to you.
• Some of the tools are exercises you can do with employees or clients. Some are specific questions that can unlock a specific situation. Some are techniques and when to use them. Some are "tools of insight," articles that share insights from my 20+ years as a conflict resolution teacher, mediator, and coach.
• Supplemental material, such as book recommendations and links to tools elsewhere.
• Everything is online, accessible 24/7 via whatever device you choose.
• Even better, every time I add new tools and resources, you'll get access to them automatically, at no additional charge.